Ouch.

If you ever want to have it driven home how out of shape you really are, take a Pilates class.

Ohmyfriggingawd that hurt.

I had my first session with Cathy today. She looks like she spends her life teaching yoga - she has a Pilates studio in California, and it's no stretch to see here doing this there - everybody drink your wheat grass and sing "Kumbaya". You know the type - middle-aged, short hair that's grey and not dyed (heaven forfend), skinny little fucker that can probably twist herself into a pretzel first thing in the morning and has probably been able to do that all her life.

She's evil. Pure, unadulterated, smiling eeeeevil. And here I was with my out of shape 46-year-old ass trying to keep up with all of the twisting, stretching, and contortions that constitute Pilates. The equipment could easily be at home in a medieval torture chamber, and my screams transformed the place into something only the Inquisition would find "fun". I see her again on Friday, goddess protect me.

All I can say is this better make me a good skater, or I'm gonna kill Will.

or better yet, lock him in a room with Cathy for an hour.

I'm coming to realize that, although I was right to retire from my dance career, I NEVER NEVER should have stopped dancing. It's hard to be a mess.

As for my skating practice this morning... Sigh. I hate that I have to spend my hour in the corner working on just staying vertical while all around me the kiddies are whizzing by, blithely executing moves that would probably put me in the hospital for a month if I tried them at this point.

I worked today mostly on coasting backward in a circle on one foot. It sounds pretty simple, but given the number of times I fell flat on my ass, I can tell you it's NOT. The only bright spot is that I inadvertently executed a back, outside 3-turn at one point (a move I'm nowhere near attempting on purpose) while I was trying to catch my balance.... and Will's dance partner saw me do it! She came over to correct my form (duh) and I had to admit to her that what looked like a passably executed 3-turn was really my pitiful attempt to keep from going face down on the ice again, and that she shouldn't expect to see it again for months. She quickly switched gears and corrected my "coasting backward on one foot" form. Gee, I wonder if I'm at least BREATHING correctly. In and out, right?

It's days like this that I really have to buck up and be willing to be BAD at something, publicly and potentially for a really long time. I've always said that everyone should do something every day that they are bad at.... but after skating AND Pilates today, I need to go do something I'm REALLY REALLY good at for an hour or so...

I just have to remember what that is.... :)