Well, it's official... my first tests are Monday August 16 at 5pm

Goddess help me, it's all official and scheduled.  My first set of dance tests are on Monday, August 16 at 5pm.  I received confirmation of the schedule from the Testing Coordinator for the club yesterday.  There, interleaved with the names of a dozen or so eleven year olds was mine. 

It's really quite strange.  I didn't think this whole testing process would phase me, really.  I mean, for god's sake I've been on stage in front of 5,000 people when the curtain went up.  A little skating test in front of a couple of judges shouldn't be anything that would cause nervousness.  Au contraire....  When I was filling out the application form, I felt that very familiar twinge of nerves hit - out of the freakin' blue.  What the f?  Really?  REALLY?

Damn.

OK - so maybe I am a little nervous.  My coaches (yes, it's official - I have two coaches now and it's fun to watch the contradict each other during my lessons - great spectator sport) have assured me that I'm more than ready for this.  In fact, they haven't decided if I'm to test on the adult track or the standard track.  The adult track standards are lower, and I think they are thinking of having me test to the standard track for a couple of reasons - first, it's a higher standard for me to aspire to, and second - I think they get more kudo's as coaches if they manage to drag my sorry adult beginner ass up to that level :)

Either way, as long as I don't lose my head this should go OK, I suppose.

I told Anna that my normal routine as a performer was to be cool as a cucumber until they call "places", at which point I become a wreck until my first entrance.  After that, I calm down and it's all just fine - but for those few minutes between times, I have a full on panic attack and believe quite convincingly that I've forgotten everything and am about to make a complete ass of myself.

It's like that old nightmare that most performers have at some point in their lives.... that they are about to go on stage and have no idea what they are supposed to do - or even what show this is.  Been there, done that.  Far too often.

Well - I suppose the bright spot is that they have me, after all, testing all three of the first set of dances.  My personal goal is to pass two of them.  If I land all three, then whoopee doodle for me - but I'll call it a success if I pass two and don't do something terribly stupid on the odd one out (like fall on my ass or, worse, trip Anna).  Been there, done that.

Sigh.  I'll keep you posted.